Things are a bit of a mess in my head today. My husband, in his usual fashion, has decided that he will head f*ck me again.

Let's re-cap:
All last week, he is really affectionate. He even crawled into my bed twice and gave me peck kisses. He bought me small presents and left them on my pillow. He then one night is hugging me and says, "My friend" therefore making a point that he is doing this without the intention of getting back togehter.

We also have a big talk and he said that he was going to go to a therapist to sort out the things in his head. (Finally!) Then he went as far as to actually book an appointment for this Wednesday.

Then he goes on his "Mates" weekend with two of his friends to Amsterdam. He then calls and texts me all weekend while he is there. Surely, he is out with his friends on a fun weekend. Why is he calling and texting me?

So, that is why I am f*cked in the head today. He is sending the most mixed signals. I think I need to be better again about telling him to leave me alone. It is all or nothing. I cannot take this back and forth anymore.