My job is dreadful. I know I have moaned about it for a long time but it is also a struggle and there aren't many jobs out there, doing what I am doing, and still allowing me to maintain a base in London.

As for my relationship, I don't know. I met with my new therapist last week. She said, "it sounds like you are insecure". Like duh. I have a job that I have dedicated myself to and I don't get any praise. I have had a husband that cheated on me for 1.5 years and told me it was in my head. And my new boyfriend told me that he didn't want to be with me, abandoned me in Portugal, and now wants me back. Shockingly, I am insecure.

I don't know. Maybe it is me? Some of it must be, but maybe all of it? I don't know anymore. I am just tired. Tired of it all. I feel like I put too much of my self emotionally into my work, friendships, etc. I don't think I get enough back. Wrong expectations?

Anyway, something for the therapist tonight, I guess. Just tired. Really really tired of everything and I feel I am just burnt out. I don't have much more to give. I am applying for new jobs but I feel perhaps, it is more of the same. Oh, well. Just sharing.