Well, hmm, well, yes.

Okay, here goes. Basically, he was cute. He was very much another friend's style of man. He was cute but in that slightly bookish, clever, self-depricating way rather than the I want to tear off your clothes now kind of way. But still cute and very English and we hit it off straight away. Lots of chatter, laughing and flirting.

We are talking about his collecting first additions and his studies in American and English literature, Americans and atrocious grammatical errors, and then went onto travel. He has spent a lot of time in Southeast Asia and we talked about the countries that we have been to. His favourite is Laos and he offers to make me dinner next week. Going well, going well. And then the pause.

"Can I be honest?" I nod, "sure".
"I have a bit of a complicated situation. You see? I feel that maybe I misled you. I have...well... there is this girl in Edinburgh that I have been seeing."

The bomb. Of course, of course there is a girl in Edinburgh. There is always a girl in Edinburgh.

He continues. "Well, it is great when I see her which isn't often and it is made all the more difficult because she has just accepted a permanent position in Afghanistan. And I told Flavia all this and she said it was fine. That I should go out with you and just have a good time."

Right, okay. He is looking really nervous and studying his beer. I am watching him for the next move and in the back of my head I am thinking 'Flavia knew about the GF? File under things to address later'.

So, I ask him about the relationship. He talks about it briefly. He is clearly confused. He likes this woman but the prospect of a year or two with someone in Afghanistan isn't really what he thinks he can handle. Then he apologies some more and again says he didn't mean to mislead me. That he saw my profile and had to ask Flavia about me and she said he should go for it.

I tell him that basically he has to figure out things with this woman and I should not be a factor and that I am not looking for an end goal so if he wants to go out for the occassional drink or dinner, and as long as he is honest about the situation, I wouldn't have a problem with that.

He seems relieved and we begin chatting about normal things again.

We get to the end of the evening and he says, "Can I be honest again?" Again, I nod.
"I think you are smart and funny and engaging and really attractive, and I would like to take you home".
Woah! Where did that one come from? I know that we have been flirting all evening but he is English. We are supposed to flirt about six months before I eventually give in and kiss him out of frustration. I am really taken aback, but complimented and kind of attracted. This boldness is unusual.

I smile and say, "thanks but this is a first date and I am not that kind of girl". (I am really but he doesn't need to know that.) He laughs and says, "fair enough. I would like to see you again. I hope that didn't ruin my chances".

It didn't but it is late and time to go. At the tube entrance he starts apologising again for not mentioning the GF and for propositioning me. I tell him it is fine but this second round of apologies is a little offputting to be honest, I feel like a mothering figure rather than an object of desire. "No, no. It is fine really".

I give him a kiss on the cheek and run into the tube.

Still not sure about it but for a first date in eight years, it wasn't a catastrophe.